Tuesday, October 23, 2007

What About Your Friends?

We BGs always value our true friendships. However, there are times when one of your girls becomes more of a bother than a buddy. When that time comes you need to know when to cut her loose. Good friends are like fine wine, they usually get better with time, but with some women, that is just not the case.

I had the difficult experience of ending a nearly 4-year friendship recently that took a lot of consideration and introspection. Ending a friendship can sometimes be as emotional as breaking up with your beau. Although, I must admit the end result can leave you feeling empowered, liberated and burden-free! I know that’s exactly how I felt with my decision to end my friendship. Take note from that episode of Girlfriends when Joan and Toni finally called it quits. It may just be television, but Joan seems to be doing just fine without Toni even though it may have hurt in the beginning.

Our time on earth is just too short to deal with someone who doesn’t add anything to our lives, but drama, stress, jealousy and a laundry list of other negative attributes. Cherish those who are always there and hold them near and dear to your heart because true friends are really hard to find.

5 Tips on When You Should End a Friendship

1.When she only points out the negatives in things that pertain to you. Example: You tell her that you just bought a new fabulous dress and she says, “It’s cute, but isn’t that style so last season?”

2.When she doesn’t support your decisions. Example: You tell her that you’re breaking up with your boyfriend because you don’t feel he treats you with respect and she says, “Girl you better keep him, you know that he’s the best thing that’s happened to you; plus, we all know you can’t keep a man.”

3.You begin to dread her phone calls.

4.Hanging out with her drains you emotionally because she always has some kind of drama.

5.You always listen and provide advice to what’s going on in her life, but when it’s her turn to lend an ear and give you some feedback she’s too busy.


Anonymous said...

Great advice! It just so happens I'm in the middle of a girlfriend break right now. It's sad on one hand because so much was invested in this 10 year relationship, however, when I stop to really look at the facts, our frienship was based on me being a good friend to her and wanting her to return the favor. It never happened. Onward and upward!

Kina said...

Love, love, love your blog. First time over here but defintely not the last. I defintely value my true friendships, and have always been that friend who is dependable and uplifting, but after reading this post, I'm beginning to re-valuate some of my girlfriends. I know and have been told that I am truly a great friend, but I guess I really can't say the same about all of them....hmmm....food for thought, thanks! ♥

Ondo Lady said...

All true, life is too short for people who just take and add nothing but drama and tension.